十萬個冷笑話英文

　　十萬個冷笑話英文一：

　　On the way home one night, I spotted some fresh-cut roses outside a florist's shop. After selecting a dozen and entering the shop, I was greeted by a young saleswoman.

　　一天晚上回家的路上，我看到一家花店外面有一些剛剪下來的玫瑰。我挑了一打，走進店里，一個年輕的女售貨員跟我打了個招呼。

　　"Are these for your wife, sir?" she asked.

　　“先生，這些是送給你妻子的嗎?”她問道。

　　"Yes," I said.

　　“是的，”我說。

　　"For her birthday?" she asked.

　　“她的生日?”她問。

　　"No," I replied.

　　“不是，”我回答。

　　"For your anniversary?"

　　“你們的結(jié)婚紀念日?”

　　"No," I said again.

　　“不是，”我又答道。

　　As I pocketed my change and headed toward the door, the young woman called out, "I hope she forgives you."

　　當我將找回的錢裝進口袋，朝門口走去時，那年輕的女人沖我喊道：“希望她能原諒你。”

　　Notes:

　　spot 認出，發(fā)現(xiàn)

　　fresh-cut 鮮切花

　　florist 種花人

　　saleswoman女售貨員

　　十萬個冷笑話英文二：

　　One evening I drove my husband's car to the shopping mall.

　　一天晚上我開著丈夫的車去購物，

　　On my return, I noticed that how dusty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit.When I finally entered the house, I called out."The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."

　　回來后發(fā)現(xiàn)車身沾滿灰塵，于是擦洗了一陣。當我終于走進屋里時大聲喊：“世界上最愛你的女人剛擦洗了你的車燈和擋風玻璃。”

　　My husband looked up and said, "Mom's here?"

　　我丈夫抬頭看了看，說：“媽媽來了?”

　　Notes:shopping mall 大型購物中心

　　headlight 前燈

　　windshield 擋風玻璃

　　十萬個冷笑話英文三：

　　One night a hotel caught fire， and the people who were staying in it ran out in their night clothes.

　　一天晚上，一家旅館失火，住在這家旅館里的人穿著睡 衣就跑了出來。

　　Two men stood outside and looked at the fire.

　　兩個人站在外面，看著大火。

　　“Before I came out，” said one，“I ran into some of the rooms and found a lot of money. People don't think of money when they're afraid. When anyone leaves paper money in a fire， the fire burns it. So I took all the bills that I could find.No one will be poorer because I took them.”

　　“在我出來之前，”其中一個說：“我跑進一些房間，找到了一大筆錢。人在恐懼中是不會想到錢的。如果有人把紙幣留在火里，火就會把它燒成灰燼。所以我把我所能找到的鈔票都拿走了。沒有人會因為我拿走它們而變得更窮。”

　　“You don't know my work，” said the other.

　　“你不知道我是干什么的。”另一個說。

　　“What is your work?”

　　“你是干什么的?”

　　“I'm a policeman.

　　“我是警察。”

　　“Oh!” cried the first man. He thought quickly and said，“And do you know my work?”“No，”said the policeman.

　　“噢!”第一個人喊了一聲。他靈機一動，說：“那你知道我是干什么的?”“不知道。”警察說。

　　“I'm a writer. I'm always telling stories about things that never happened.”

　　“我是個作家。我總是愛編一些從未發(fā)生過的故事。”

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